Good morning, Lord.

Bless you for giving me another day. I kinda blew it yesterday. My so-called friend was no friend. She hurt me so badly. I felt my heart rip from my chest. I couldn't even breathe. I was so betrayed, exposed, and publicly humiliated. I cried all day and most of last night. How do I deal with this? I'm so angry and hurt, and I just can't get past this. What am I gonna do?

Give it to me.

No No No! Give to you? Why, so you can forgive her? No. Vengeance, Lord! She deserves to be punished. She was wicked and deliberately hateful. I'd never have treated anyone the way she's treated me.

But you will now? Unforgiving, vengeful, hateful? That's not my way.

Lord, you don't understand. This was big! Inside it felt as bad as rape, murder, or finding your spouse with someone else! This is big, too big to simple "forgive". Besides, I was the one wronged. I have a right to be angry. I deserve justice!

Hosea had a right to be angry and vengeful, and turn his back on Gomer. But for me, he went out and found her and brought her back. Back to his life and back to his bed. And you had to know how he felt. How people talked behind his back. How many times have you been unfaithful to me?

Me, Lord?

How many times did you fail to pray?

Uh?

How many times did you put your family, friends, even TV before your time with me?

Gulp! But--

Do you think I'm not hurt or offended? What if I chose to be vengeful and unforgiving? I have a right to be angry, too!

Lord, it was never on purpose. I could never hurt you like she hurt me. I could never be like that.

Yet you'll seek vengeance out of hatred? Don't you know that whatever you do to the least of these, you do unto me? Rape and murder are no different than lies and disobedience. They all hurt me deeply. One is no greater than the other. And fueling thr fire with your bitterness, anger, resentment and unforgiveness only drops you to her level and keeps you away from me. Now I have to be away from the one I love. Because you built this wall between us saying, "I will not forgive. This is too big." Come on, my love. Give it to me. It is too big for you.

God, I'm so sorry. Please forgive me - and forgive my friend, too. Take away all the anger and resentment inside me and cast it as far as the east is from the west. I don't want to hurt you anymore.

Thank you, Sweetheart. Now remember, this is settled between us. No sneaking back and looking for pieces to stir up. See, your friend doesn't talk to me. She's not aware of our conversation. She may hurt your feelings again. But I want you to love her anyway. I want you to be her friend.

Her friend? Love her? How do you love somebody you don't even like?

Come on, do it for me. Pretend she's your best buddy. Do for her what you would do for your best friend.

That's a lot to ask, Lord. But if it's what you want me to do, then I need and extra portion 'cuz I ran out yesterday!

I'll give you all you need, child.

Ok, Lord. Then I pray these hands will be your hands and this smile, your smile. Overpower me with loving kindness and tender mercies. Let your grace and favor be mine. And Lord, give me the strength to do it with a glad heart. Thank you for straightening me out today. I gotta go now. But I'll talk to you later.

Love Always,
 
Rose